Basement Chronicles

Two Paths

"Things used to be a different way
Whatever happened to the Golden Age?"

Ah, elections.

I say that like I've ever participated in one. Sorry, Dr. Miller, I have failed you.

Anyhow, now we have a new president. Sorta. Oh yeah, and the world is ending. Oh well. At least now I can divert my attention to more important things. Like writing Chronicles. And cultivating facial hair. I'm trying to decide on a good length. I've boiled it down to luscious or glorious. Any thoughts?

I was talking the other day with Robbie and I had a sudden realization. No, not that, I love animal flesh.

There are two kinds of men in the world: those who, as children, wanted to be Cyclops, and those who wanted to be Wolverine.

First: Ladies, I am truly sorry. Girls were kinda icky back then, so I have no idea whether you watched X-men. Until Halle Berry and Famke Janssen played Storm and Jean Grey I had pretty much completely ignored their characters based upon the fact that Jubilee was so freaking lame. Fireworks...psh.

Second: Don't give me that crap about wanting to be Gambit or Beast. This was long before you understood the allure of gambling or being blue.

Third: Of course, there is the slightest chance that you haven't seen any of these shows. I'm not sure where you fit into this whole mess. Maybe you lead normal, fruitful lives outside the influence of this compendium of story-telling brilliance.

What the hell am I talking about?

Well, I'll be the first to admit that I am entirely underqualified to be making this assertion. Every Saturday I felt a little bit of sadness when I woke up. Why? Because I knew that I immediately had to go to hockey practice. And hockey practice was ALWAYS, ALWAYS happening right when X-men was on. I laced up my skates knowing that Wolverine was kicking some Sentinel ass. I strapped on my velcro shinpads knowing that Jubilee was busy being a plot device (ie, Being captured due to her rebellious teengage shenanigans).

I shivered during my warm-ups knowing exactly what I was missing.

How did I know? Well, being in 1st-3rd grade, that's all the schoolkids really have to talk about.

As a child, this was traumatic. I'd shaken my Ninja Turtles phase sometime after 1st grade, so I had no heroes to admire. No mini-series to get excited about. No "to be continued" to obsess over.

Instead, I was just a normal kid. Mostly. That is, of course, until I was to partake in this unknown phenomenon with my friends who were die-hard fans.

So what happened?

Well, I had to come to a decision. A decision that would affect the rest of my life.

Lasers from your eyes, or indestructible Adamantium claws?

But I knew not of what these things were. I'd never seen the show. How could I possibly make an intelligent decision on insufficient data?

Then it came...

"So who do you want to be, Josh?"
"What?"
"Which X-men, um, X-man do you want to be?"
"Um, I don't know, what are they?"
"They're mutants with superhuman powers that fight Magneto!"
"Oh, what're their powers?"
"Well, Wolverine has indestructible Adamantium claws, Cyclops can shoot lasers from his eyes, Gambit can throw charged cards, and Beast is really smart."
"Wow, um, Beast sounds kinda cool."
"You can't be beast."
"What about Gambit?"
"Not him either, there's only two of us, so you have to be either Cyclops or Wolverine."

We may have had speech impediments, but we could pronounce "indestructible Adamantium claws". Give us a little credit. And we'd already picked up on the fact that Gambit and Beast were only supporting characters anyhow.

But little did I know the real weight of the question my friend was asking me.

Who do I want to be?

Wolverine, Logan, a near-immortal amnesiac who wanders the lands searching for his past. Gruff, tough, and seemingly always violent. A fighter. An animal. No resonsibilities. And no answers.

Cyclops, Scott Summers, leader of the X-men, married to Jean Grey. He has it all. Cool costume. Cool shades. All the answers, and all the responsibility that comes along with them. Always saving everybody else at his own self-sacrifice. A human being.

Little did I know...

"Well, can I be Wolverine?"
"No, I'm gonna be Wolverine, you're going to be Cylcops."
"Why can't I be Wolverine?"
"You can be him next time."

Next time. Well, there never was a next time. He was always Wolverine. I was always Cyclops. Or beast, when we both figured out that computers were cool, 'cause Beast was cool, and he used computers. And he was blue.

There you have it. The exact moment. Where two paths diverged in a yellow wood. Or blue.

I never watched the show but maybe twice. I saw enough, though. I saw the choice that I'd made.

So what now? Where has this brought me? Well, I'm in college. I have a few answers. Maybe.

Where is my friend? I don't really know. I haven't heard from him in years.

This all comes from the fact that I've seen X2 three times in the last week. And apparently Paul has bought somewhere near 70 episodes of the original show. Its gonna be friggin' awesome.

The movie brings up an interesting question.

Do we really want all the answers? Or rather, are the answers worth the price they demand? And are there really any answers at all for the questions we ask?

Adam wanted the answers. And he got them, at the price of original sin.

Prometheus gave man the answers. And he got chained to a rock with an eagle eating his liver.

I really don't beleive either stories, but I believe in their implications. At some point in our lives we have to make such a decision. Whether we really want to know. Whether there's an answer at all.

For the record, I wanted to be Wolverine.

Who did you want to be?